In last week’s blog, we discussed some basic veterinary clinic etiquette or what NOT to do in a veterinary clinic. Since I’m a mixed animal practitioner, it only seems appropriate to make a farm call edition to this topic as much of my work is on a farm or even at our corral or haul-in facilities. Our farm call list isn’t quite as extensive as the clinic list. No worries small animal clients! Farmers have lots of practice and get to learn this in large herds multiple times a year, but you usually stick to one lifetime pet. However, I have seen farm animals brought in on a leash, so you never know what animal is going to become a lifelong pet. Farmers can cause the occasional stir. The following are my “don’ts” for farm calls or cattle work. Enjoy! 1. Putting things off- *phone rings at 10 P.M. and I jolt awake in a stupor* Okay okay, I realize it’s kind of lame that I’m sound asleep at 10 P.M., but I’m eight months pregnant so give me a break. I answer, “Hello, this is Dr. Stroupe.” “Hey, Dr. Stroupe! I got a heifer here that’s having some trouble calving. I saw her trying to calve around two days ago and didn’t think much of it. I think she probably needs a little help.” I reply, “Okay, we’ll head that way.” I then hang up the phone and let out a few expletives. He saw her calving two days ago and it’s an emergency now at 10 P.M. Are you #$%!ing kidding me?! I should probably point out that this isn’t typical for most of our producers. Most of my clients know that both the calf and the cow are worth a heck of a lot more alive than dead, so it’s good to stay on top of things. However, this does happen on occasion, and when it does, it’s a doozy. At this point, the calf will obviously be dead. The heifer will also be at risk of dying of sepsis or infection. When cattle have been laboring for multiple days, they also often lose their natural lubrication, making delivery of the calf quite difficult. To add to it, the calf will often swell as it decays, making it harder to pull. On top of it, Dr. Stroupe gets to smell rotten calf on her hands for the foreseeable future as that smell is quite difficult to get rid of. I understand more than anyone that the cattle business has a huge economic component. I also married into a family where if you see a sick cow, you might wait a day or two to see if she gets better on her own. But many times when it comes to sick animals, putting things off is only going to make matters worse and risk losing the animal altogether. Not to mention you’ll tick off your very pregnant veterinarian that has to get out of bed at 10 P.M. for a problem that could have been solved a couple of days ago during regular office hours. 2. Not bringing your own cattle through the alleyway. I’ve run into this situation a time or two when I’m working cattle at the corral by the clinic. The producer backs up the chute and unloads the calves to be vaccinated and castrated. They’ll bring the gates around so now we have a group of twenty calves standing there, ready to be loaded in the tub. As I’m filling my syringes and getting things ready to work the cattle, I realize I don’t hear the characteristic thump of the tub as it slams shut. I walk to the end of the alleyway and look around the corner to see the producer just standing there, giving me a blank stare just like the calves. Apparently we have some producers that not only expect you to work their cattle for them but also get in the pen with them (with cattle you don’t know and have never been around before), herd them into the tub, and run them up the alleyway. This is not an efficient way to work cattle as I can’t do my job quickly when I’m having to run back and forth and herd your cattle for you. If you own cattle, surely you know what a sorting stick is and how to use it. If not, it’s about time you figured it out. Plus, if you’re standing back while my female technician and I work all the cattle and herd them for you, your man card is going to be officially revoked (kind of like the calves I’m castrating). Of course, the elderly and infirm are withheld from this rule. Some may want to get their money’s worth out of the vet, but believe me, you’ll get the most out of me when I’m at the head of the chute doing what I do best. Too much back and forth nonsense, and I start charging by the hour. And nobody wants that. 3. Don’t overload the tub! This is a pet peeve of mine and probably most veterinarians. It’s inevitable that if a farmer brings in 25 calves to work, he will try to shove all 25 of those calves into the tub. This is an attempt to save time as opening up the tub and herding smaller groups of calves into the tub seems like it would take much longer. Tubs are designed to work most efficiently with three to four calves in the tub at a time. Take it from someone who has worked many, many cattle in their lifetime and has seen first-hand what works and doesn’t work. I guarantee that large group of calves in the tub will circle and circle and not go down the alleyway. The producer will then get frustrated and transition from a sorting stick to a hot shot. This results in the calves just going in circles even faster and not going down the alleyway. This is not a time-saver. Tubs work most efficiently when three to four calves are loaded in there at a time. Yes, that means you will have to open the tub multiple times and load smaller groups in, but trust me, it will save time in the long run. Plus, the extra exercise is good for you, you lazy bum! I kid, kind of. In addition, you’ll probably be able to coax the calves down the alleyway without resorting to using a hot shot. Low stress cattle handling should always be a goal. 4. Castration concerns in huge bulls. I’m thankful that a lot of my producers are on board with castrating calves at a young age. However, every veterinarian has some producers that either choose to wait or just put off castrating their calves until they’re about 800 pounds. Inevitably, these producers will also spend a lot of time asking questions about the risks of their calves bleeding out when you castrate them. Newsflash: It’s a bit too late for you to be concerned about your calves bleeding out. If you're bringing in your calves at 800 pounds to castrate, then yes, there's a distinct possibility that one or two of them will bleed out. Even if they don't, calves this size will drop a lot of weight for days to weeks just from the stress of castration at such a large size. Some producers are still convinced that they grow more if you wait to castrate them. Science and literature does not support that (that’s my nice way of saying that you’re WRONG. So wrong.) Study after study shows that calves that are castrated (surgically or banded) at or after weaning show increased sickness, stress, and death loss. When compared to calves castrated at less than three months of age, calves castrated late in life weigh twenty to forty pounds less at slaughter and are marketed twelve days later. Bulls castrated at 500 pounds or greater also tend to have less marbling than bulls castrated earlier. Beef tenderness ratings decrease the heavier the bulls are at the time of castration. There you go, producers. You just got schooled by science. Some people don’t care about evidence and science, but at least I try. While we’re on the subject of castrating, let’s talk about banding for a second. Studies show that there is no difference between calves that are banded or knife cut less than three days of age. However, I can’t stress enough that if you’re going to band, please do it correctly! As a veterinarian, I will have unkind words to say if I have to practically crawl under a calf with a knife and pry a testicle from a bunch of scar tissue because you don’t know know how to band. Place your band and then “count to two.” There should be two testicles below the band. 5. Just dropping by!....with a load of 30 calves. There has been many an occasion where my receptionist answers the phone, and the person on the other line says, “Yeah. I’ve got my trailer loaded with thirty calves and I’m driving down the highway headed your way.” Wait….what?! Look, I realize that sometimes when you go out to feed calves, all the animals come up and you’re able to wrangle them with ease. You think, “Hey! Now would be a great opportunity to load them up in the trailer and take them to the vet to be worked.” Not so fast, Cowboy! I’m happy to work your cattle and have your business, but in the course of time it takes to load those cattle in the trailer, you might want to call the clinic and make sure a veterinarian is available on short notice to work your animals. Odds are, we’re probably not sitting around waiting for you to get there. Otherwise, my sassy office manager may tell you to turn around or you may be waiting in our parking lot for a couple hours. And just an FYI, if I have to work through my lunch hour because an unexpected load of cattle show up, let’s just say Dr. Stroupe gets a little hangry and might not have nice things to say. Yes, hangry. It’s a real word and it’s the combination of anger and hunger that comes with going a long time without eating. In my case, that’s about two hours. So if you’re just going to drop in, at least bring food to soften the blow. I like cheese curds from Dairy Queen with ranch dressing...with a chili cheese dog. An Orange Julius wouldn’t hurt, either, you know, for the folic acid while I’m making a baby. Just saying. 6. Tie her up! I’m pretty sure nearly every mixed or large animal veterinarian has experienced this. A producer calls late at night and says, “Hey Doc, I have this old cow that’s sick. She’s down in the pasture.” I say, “Oh? Do you have her tied to anything?” “No Doc, she’s down and there’s no way she’s getting up anytime soon.” I would explain what I usually tell them next, but it would ruin the story. I pull up at their farm and the producer meets me at their gate. He hops in the truck next to me and tells me where to drive through the hills of the pasture. We arrive at a tree line where the sick cow rests. She sees my strange truck and her head and ears perk up. I realize at this point that the producer didn’t tie her up like I told him to. I slowly step out of the truck, and ‘ol Bessie decides to hightail it into the woods. Yes, “she’s down and there’s no way she’s getting up anytime soon” are famous last words, my friend. Famous last words. Most cows that are “down” will take off when they see a strange vehicle and unfamiliar people step out of it. So for the love of God, tie up those down cows! Because after two hours of chasing your sick cow through the woods, I might conclude that they’re not really sick enough to treat. 7. Put your darn dogs away! A good rule to follow is if you’ve called a veterinarian out to your farm to work on your horses or livestock, please put your dogs away! I just love it when there are three to four dogs running around under a table with a $14,000 ultrasound machine on it. Treating a scared, sick cow? That dog on the back of your gator barking is not helping things. Horses and cattle are prey animals and dogs are predators, so it's in their nature to be uneasy around our canine friends. Most veterinarians, whether they're working a herd, suturing a laceration on a horse, or treating a sick cow, just want to finish the job and keep the animals as stress free as possible. Make our job a little easier and keep Rover penned up, Mmmkay? 8. Chute etiquette. Most people are aware that veterinarians do a lot of things near the hind end of cattle. Naturally, we're in a pretty vulnerable position when we're back there sometimes. Sometimes, our friendly farmers unknowingly put us in those vulnerable positions. FYI, doing anything at the head of cattle when we're at their hind end can cause problems. You think cows get ticked off when we stick our arms up their rectum? They get even more ticked off when you mess with them anywhere around their face. It's a common fact for ruminants. Farmers, my plea to you is this: Please don't mouth your cows (open their mouth to check their age) while I'm preg checking them or open the chute before I've finished preg checking them. Most importantly, please don't put an ear tag in your bull at the exact same time I'm measuring his scrotal circumference. I'm literally grabbing life by the balls at this point, so try not to make it more difficult for me. As I said with the with the veterinary clinic etiquette list, most of my clients know the ins and outs already, so this doesn’t apply to them. There are a few that I will be printing and slyly sliding it behind a producer’s bill after we work calves. I’ll slap it on some official letterhead and call it a newsletter!
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Jessica Stroupe, DVM
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August 2017
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